Fifteen.

And this. This is to you.

She may be here.
But it won't be forever.

Who's been here the longest?
Who's helped me through so much?

Who's laughed and cried and smoked and joked with me?

Who's the one sitting across the table from me on December 15th.

Remember that. And when you feel like I'm not there enough.
Remember December 15th and know that you are the only person in this entire universe who can sit across the table from me on that day.

Fourteen.

Growing up. The hardest thing anyone will ever have to do in life is that. My life has changed drastically over the past few years and it's crazy to look back at the things I used to do and the things I used to care about. Now things are totally different. Today it's about, having a job, getting school done before it's too late. It's about finding and being with that "perfect" someone. Everyone who enters my life has an effect on the things I choose to do. So which people stay? Which people go? Is there ever a good way to make a decision like that? It's not easy. People say it will get better, but I really wonder if it ever will.

This is to all the people who walked into my life and changed me and made me who I am today.
This is to all the things I've done that have made me the strong person I am.
This is to all the boys who broke my heart, but taught me something.

And finally... this is to all the people who are still here.
After all the tears, and the bullshit. You guys are the ones who matter.

Thirteen.

So, this letter is to you. You know who you are. Things suck between us right now. We used to be really close but I feel like we've grown apart a lot. And I feel like I can't trust you sometimes. I know you've said some things behind my back, and I've heard about it and it hurts that you would say things like that about me. I'm supposed to be your best friend and you're not supposed to say things like that about me. Ever. End of story. But you do... and that sucks. I know I've said shit about you too but it's never been anything major... well at least I don't think it has been. If it has I apologize. We shouldn't talk about each other behind each others backs. We should be there to support each other. And I know I haven't been very supportive about you moving to Edmonton, but that's because I'm not ready for you to just leave again. You left me once. I didn't have you at all for like 2 and a half years. And then when you guys broke up I hardly got to have it be just me and you.... cuz you were so obsessed with guys. And then you met him and now you guys are together. I know eventually we all grow up, but I've just never had a chance to hang out with you and have it just be you and me because you've always had someone else on your mind. You've always had someone else who knew just that little bit more about you then I did. Even your current boyfriend knows something about you that I don't. That effing hurts, more then like anything else. I don't really know what to do about you anymore. Some days you really annoy me but sometimes I just miss you, even when I'm with you. You're still my best friend and always will be and I don't ever want that to change. Ever. I love you. No one could ever replace you and the things we've been through together.

I love you.
Autumn + Reighn.
December 15, Forever.